Accepting my new life has been a little difficult for me, and it's only going to get worse once John moves out. About 2 weeks ago, he started packing. It hit me so hard that I begged him to stay and try to work things out with me. He accepted, but it was a halfhearted attempt on his part, which put us right back to him packing.
The plan is for him to be not living here by Wednesday. He has a temporary place to go, and I'm being nice enough to let him move his stuff in the garage until he has a more permanent place to go. This will be hard too, because it means eventually he will come back for his things, again bringing on a lot of emotions. But I want to be nice and save him money on a storage unit so he can move on with his life.
I'm really terrified, not to be alone, because I already felt alone, but scared to do the adult activities on my own: paying bills, raising 2 dogs, mowing the lawn and other adult things that I must do.
Mostly, I'm scared that my dogs are going to experience more alone time while I'm working my busy days at work.
As my best friend said though, its time to put my big girl pants on and be an adult.
Learning how to be rebuild my relationship while working my way to 40lbs lighter, one day at a time. Along the way, I'm building relationships, training my dogs, and managing my full time job with school. Here's to looking fabulous, feeling even better and embracing life to the fullest!
